*Encouragement is the best medicine to give someone. If I were to pick any gift to have in helping others, that would be the one*

Friday, January 29, 2010

Asperger syndrome called a factor in his theft of credit data

I was reading this article about a man who they believe has Asperger Syndrome involved in some thefts.  It's an interesting article and the whole version can be read HERE

“It’s not that people with Asperger syndrome do not know right for wrong,’’ Jekel said. “They don’t understand the potential consequence of what they are doing.’’


But Jason Evan Mihalko, a Cambridge psychologist who has worked with such patients, said it’s hard to imagine the disorder would spur someone to break into retail computer networks to steal millions of credit card numbers and then sell the data. Prosecutors allegedly seized more than $1.6 million from Gonzalez, including more than $1 million buried in his parents’ backyard.

Mihalko said the vast majority of people with Asperger syndrome never commit a crime. And when people do get in trouble, it’s typically because they take one of their obsessions too far - someone with trains, for instance, might break into a train to find out how it works. Or someone interested in electronics might steal a device to take it apart. But he said that does not mean people with Asperger syndrome can’t understand that stealing credit card data is wrong.

“Most everyone learns in school - or from parents - that stealing is wrong,’’ Mihalko said. “It’s no different for kids with Asperger’s.’’

What are your thoughts about this article?

Not a Freak


After reading Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger's, I realize how wrong I've been in so many ways expecting Chaz to be just like his brothers.  Why do I continually forget???  I ask questions like "Don't you care?  Why are you being so mean?"  Instead I need to bring him to me and show him the proper way to have handled something.  It's a social disorder yet I forget and forget and forget.  The book is opening my eyes to the fact that I am making situations impossible for Chaz.  No, he's not a cold person.  Yes, he has a hard time understanding empathy.  He's not "a jerk" as other kids call him.  He just came and bumped into them because he wanted to be their friend.  They reject him all the time.  They call him a freak.  He's not a freak.  He's my son and he only wants to make a friend.  Any friend.

Friday, January 22, 2010

In Chaz's School Days



Chaz is the boy in the middle row on the left.

In speaking with another father on the Asperger group page, I was able to give him some ideas. I started to remember some things that had really helped my son in the past that I had forgotten about.  Boy, I need to apply some of these things again!

My son has been to 9 schools and none would work for him. However, a few years back, my son just happened to get a teacher who had trained to work with Asperger kids for 3 years. Boy did I get lucky! She helped Chaz so much that his symptoms went way down. She said Asperger kids are VERY visual and need a visual schedule. He needed to have a schedule, with pictures added, of his day. He also needed to be able to cross the activity off that they finished.  She put a cover over the paper so the marker could be wiped off to make clean for the next day.  Also, his desk was not right next to other students and closer to the teacher. She also put a cushion on his chair since some Asperger kids are more sensitive around their legs. These three things were key for my son. She wore a necklace with cards on them for Chaz. Instead of saying outloud, "Shhh, be quite". She would hold up a small card with a picture on it to show him. It showed a smiley face making the "shh" symbol. They listen much quicker when they see visual vs hearing it.  However, she was a first grade teacher so he no longer could have her. Unfortunately, he went back downhill again once that happened. I now homeschool him because other teachers would not do the same stuff for him. Either that or they were already too overwhelmed.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Look Me In The Eye-Updated


I just checked out this book and I'm looking forward to reading it.  When I read more I will post about it here.  I need to spend more time trying to understand Aspergers.  I know a lot about Aspergers but I really need to find out how to help my son directly.  Taking action and finding what will work for him.  I know I can't expect him to be like his siblings.  The balance for me is how not to treat him TOO differently.  I hated hearing him call himself a freak because of other kids at school.  Now that he is home with me I can control the environment more.  I feel like I am rebuilding his self esteem again.

UPDATE:  The more I read into this book I have began to understand my son.  There is a broad spectrum with Aspergers and even though everything doesn't apply to my son, I recognize a lot of things.  I included the link because this book will captivate you as you read it.  What John went through as a child and his parents not understanding his behavior. 

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Just Homeschool Chaz?



Today has been a really, really tough day with Chaz. Actually, that's an understatement. It's been a bad month. The whole reason why I homeschooled Chaz is because he doesn't do well at all in a classroom setting.  The only thing is Chaz is so much work just by himself that it's very challenging to have the time to homeschool the others. Unless of course I want to homeschool day and night.  I'm getting closer to the idea of letting my other kids be in a regular classroom and just homeschooling Chaz.  The other idea is homeschool the rest of the kids and put Chaz in a regular classroom. Argh.  Decisions.  I will have to think about it.  I'm just overwhelmed right now with all the emotional stuff and just trying to figure out how to help Chaz.  If anyone has any ideas, I would love them!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Wound Up

These last couple of days with Chaz I have been noticing that he doesn't act at all like other kids his age.  Sooo different.  He acts more like a 4 year old in many ways.  I guess I didn't really know how 9 year olds should act till I started seeing other kids his age and payed attention.  Chaz still will curl up in a ball and scream.  He throws lots of tantrums.  He says a lot of crap.  You can say to Chaz "okay, well now you are going in time out".  He'll freak out.  So then when he starts freaking out I'll say, "well now you are gonna have to lay down for awhile in your bed."  He'll freak out more.  "Okay, now I want you to take a nap."  Then he's hysterical by this point.  It's like winding up something tighter and tighter.  Threatening Chaz about anything will not make him want to stop.  It only freaks him out because he gets really worked up.  Before I used to punish him for this but now I have to keep reminding myself that Chaz is someone that you have to calm down or "unwind".  Sometimes he gets a look on his face and I KNOW he's gonna walk around the house and see who he can bother.  Like "oh no, here it comes.  He's gonna cause mayhem."  Sure enough he'll get all the kids in the house squealing and upset.  Then I have to separate him which only makes him very angry.
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