*Encouragement is the best medicine to give someone. If I were to pick any gift to have in helping others, that would be the one*

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Aspergers Obsessions: Is That All You Want to Talk about?

The other day I took Chaz to the gym with me since he is now old enough to work out.  He got to get a new membership card that states he can go anywhere in the gym by himself. Well, when we got there he didn't want me to leave his side since he had no one to talk to or play with. I really wanted to go straight upstairs to the gym.  He looked over and saw his friend that he met the last time we came. I was excited and showed Chaz so we went over to talk.  Turns out, this boy also has Aspergers Syndrome!  No wonder why they got along well together.  Chaz has a best friend who has Aspergers Syndrome and they get along fantastic.  He was okay with me leaving to work out since he could now go swimming with his friend.  While I worked out upstairs, Chaz and his friend swam.  The picture is the view of the indoor pool I see while working out.

After I was done I went with Chaz, the boy, and his mom to the basketball court.  I like to observe other Aspergers kids to see how they are similar.  It was obvious his obsession was sports.  The whole time we were there that is what he wanted to talk about and do.  He never deviated.  It helped me to see that I need to be careful about how much I get frustrated at Chaz's obsession with games.  He likes to play them AND talk about them a lot.  I don't let him play all day but he will talk all the time about it whether or not you are listening.  I would get soooo frustrated sometimes but try not to show it.  Watching this boy talk so much about sports made me realize that I can't change Chaz. I can encourage Chaz, but what's wrong with him wanting to talk about what he loves?  Nothing.  Sure, it's excessive at times but that's how he is and I shouldn't make him feel bad about it.  

Chaz is such a good boy and I think I was just looking at that issue wrong.  He is happy talking about video games.  He does want to play basketball and is joining a league next month.  I'm hoping this time the coach worries more about teaching the kids how to play well rather than only caring about winning.  Chaz's last coach would bench the same kids so he could use the ones that would win the game.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Parent to an Aspergers Preteen

Soooo, I'm a parent to a preteen.  Should I be scared?  I am!  Aggggh!  Okay, when I can say I'm a parent to a teenager I will officially feel old.  I can see older people than me just rolling their eyes right now.  To them I say, don't you remember that feeling too?  I can't believe it because today Chaz turned 12.  12 years since I became a mom.  It was the scariest day of my life and I'm not exaggerating.  I had no idea what to do with a little one and had never really taken care of any babies.  I felt it was a crime for anyone to let me take this little guy home from the hospital.  I called the doctor every week with a new question, sometimes several times a week.  Now Chaz is twelve and I'm wondering how to navigate the teens years that are coming.  Oh well.  We'll have this conversation next year on this day. For now, he's still my baby.  Heh heh.  Don't tell him I said that.

My question is, what will it be like to parent an Aspergers teen?  That is one thing I don't want to be told about.  I thought it'd get easier as they get older but it doesn't.  If anything, it's gotten much harder.  I'm glad no one told me that back when Chaz was six and I was new to the word Aspergers.  I had to take just one day at a time back then.  Today, I just love my son with the good days and the bad days.  He's funny, challenging, and keeps me on my toes.  For real! Ha ha!  I love you, Chaz.
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