Ask An Asperger

I got a chance to chat with an someone who would like to remain anonymous as she is an author.  I was so grateful to her for sharing this with me.  Thank you so much, to you know who, for talking with me, answering my questions, and bringing insight.  I hope I kept this as anonymous as possible. Sadly, people can be judgemental.  Hopefully this can help you to understand some things Asperger people go through.  She had Asperers before it was ever even diagnosed so her struggles were not explained till later in her life.  Thank goodness we can find out early of age now and start young to improve their lives.  :)  I know it has mattered for Chaz.

BTW, I kept the chat exactly as it was so I apologize if parts of it are hard to read as we were just typing fast to each other and not worried about perfecting it.

Anonymous Asperger: when i was so little, 4 in 1st grade i stayed to myself at private school.  i was a runt, and picky eater.

Me: since I started Asperger Moms, I'm telling you....so many write saying thank you, thank you, thank you for giving us a place to talk to each other. ask questions. .

AA: I did not like spaghetti like most, it reminded me of worms..

Me: yeah, Chaz is smaller.  :).  I have to always encourage him to eat.

AA: I was a colic baby

AA:  that is a big sign right there.amen. that's proof of who we are.and we are good with children, and mean to mean ones when we are little.we see things others don't, insight.so we are quiet. we feel as if we don't belong.we feel like aliens/alienated..

Me: So, believe me, so many moms need help and understanding. Have you joined a group? So many ask questions but you have the ability to answer many of them. I will get you link.

AA: i am still a loner.

AA: as we get older we are stronger in who we are, accept it and we don't need like others do.

AA: most get diagnosed by 4 yrs. old and younger. thank you, i joined those links..

Me: Chaz was 5. I didn't know why it was SO hard and a social worker brought the idea to me to have him checked out. It was a relief for me.

Me: people have answers as to how to help but I only know from an outside view. It is great to talk with you now that you are an adult, growing up with Aspergers.  You understand what it is like and how families and school can help.

AA: everyone has ups and downs. and their medicines give chemical lobotomies..

Me: You should start a fan page called Ask an Asperger (I mean, seriously, she has insight because of her own personal experience).

AA: well, if they ask, you have permission to send them my way, and i can only tell them about me and what i know. omg. it may ill effect other things i do, as many see it as being incompetent..

Me: Really? I see.

AA: but you can blog it, "ask an asperger," then you can refer them to me.so long as they are aware that i may be judged, and that is how they can ask me, via you.they can message my site here..

AA: we don't have special needs, we are special..

Me: Yes, exactly. :).

AA: i am my mother's favourite. she said she always had to keep me busy with so many things, hobbies, so i would not get bored and become reclusive she wants my brain to work all the time. it helps.but balance, diet, etc. is the key.believing in one's self..

Me: Can you explain the diet?

AA: she had to take my barbies away in high school .no corn syrup.juice not from concentrate.sugar is better than corn syrup actually.organic things.lots of veggies.lots of greens..

Me: what about red dye in foods?.

AA: I hated them as a kid (veggies), and hated green beans. now i love it all, became a vegetarian at 13. i steer clear of preservatives and cr*p.i don't use dairy.i use rice water.okay, if i am hungry, for a snack i use natural chicken in a can, with best food mayo, it has no corn syrup, other do if you read..

Me: Thank you, I will look into that diet..

AA: i don't use a lot of bread, but if i do, to keep weight on, i use it with no corn syrup.  Also, no stimulants at all.no coffee, no tea, no nicotine, no soda pops.water, juices rice water..

Me: Well, he is also ADHD so dr told me to sometimes give him coffee to settle him down..

AA: i replied a little to that, but felt kind of stupid..

 Me: what do you mean?.

AA: he's wrong, he is not that.we are hyper to most.we really have so much to share and say, and it can't all come out at the same time.most say, that now, i am making up for lost time, in that i talk so much now..

Me: that's how he is! He talks soooo fast to get it all out that I have to tell him to slow down..

AA: lol.but others say, now she has something to say.some stutter because of that, my twins did, but slowed down a bit, if not too excited when speaking.. (She also has Asperger children and grandchildren).

Me: Yeah, he stutters sometimes because of it. In Children's church, he is pretty immature for his age so the older kids look at him funny and tend to stay away. Makes me sad..

AA: gramps gave me coffee in a bottle with milk and sugar, but very little. it was European for hyper rather than ritadrine.i even now sometimes can stumble over my words. but most times we speak as little scholars, if listened to.oh, wait till they see him blossom, and come into his own, they will fear him.most fear me, and don't know why.they get intimidated.we don't like to be cornered, we don't like being told what to do, we don't like being told we can't do something-we will prove that wrong.and we don't like no..

Me: Thank you for talking with me. I really needed it. I have over 600 friends that are either Aspergers or have an Asperger child on facebook account.

AA: most say where did you get your accent, united kingdom??? Australia? we speak so fast in our dialect.my mother understands me, but sometimes she will tell me to slow down. smiles..

Me: I have to tell Chaz that. :)

AA: when we get to teen years we run away. also we become suicidal ideation-a way to run away from problems we can't handle, not mature enough, we are not depressed or sad, we just run from it.i don't have the nervousness/anxiety any longer, and no meds.the only great medicine and it's not benzo....

Me: Yikes, that is scary. But I am not surprised at all because I deal with these issues with my son.  I try to encourage him a lot and buil up his self esteem.

AA: is klonopin, chlonazipam, but not over prescribed..

Me: Chaz has talked about hurting himself a lot before.  But there had been a lot of rejection in school he was attending.  I moved him to a different school and he is doing much better.

AA: it helps with autism and seizures due to it. no more lamictal and cr*p you don't need. just one pill a day.and have his thyroid checked semi-annually.we have those problems..

Me: Thank you for chatting with me. :) I really needed it.